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Every once and a while I stop to think about the passage of time, how time flies, where I am in the timeline of things etc. Tonight as I walked Arden up to her bath and then bed I thought to myself, I’d better take this opportunity to hold her hand, I may not get many more. Could be the last, obviously I certainly wouldn’t think it was but it could be. Its the last today anyways, and every moment as she grows I want to be sure I spend time with her and be a great dad just like my dad was for me.
I reminisce likely because my whole family just left after staying here a week (on the island) and Lindseys whole family before that.
I quickly think to the days gone by when I was the child through the years and growing up in Cannington with all its troubles and adventures and craziness (and the seemingly frequent knocks on the door by other angry parents or police because I was such a model child that they were all jealous..) Those times I remember felt like forever, seemed like I’d never get to high school, then it seemed like I’d never get out of highschool, then it seemed like I’d never get a job or finish college. Then it seemed like I’d be single for the rest of my life living alone or with interesting roommates in Guelph in my apartment there. So many phases of life felt as if they would last forever and at the same time they all flew by in an odd sort of way.
So many memories, good experiences and bad that I’ll never be part of again. Like family vacations to places where only mom and dad knew what to do and where to go, places I could get lost in. I also remember the thrill of Christmas morning when we get to open presents, or birthdays too, whereas now, its just not the same thing.
In my family I’ve lost all my grandparents to old age and I thought I’d be the one who had the family that never died. I looked at the other families where a member died of cancer, or a car crash and I was truly thankful for my family, we were all alive, healthy. Now I’m 35 (or something like that) and many members of my family have passed away.
I think lots about how long I’ll be around for Arden, how much of her grandparents she’ll see and how much she’ll get to know them. She doesn’t have a chance now to meet my mom and I wish she was able to, so too with Jack.
So as I walk little Arden up the stairs she trusts me 100% to keep her from falling and to support her and hug her when she gets an owee. I hope I’m around to see her grow up for many many many years but at the same time, its almost sad that we all have to grow up. Family time is fleeting and our lives are too, especially the different stages of our lives, from young child (young dad) to older child (and older dad) and family trips and allowances and playing soccer on our lawn to organized sports and music lessons.
It just all goes too quickly, year by year, season by season. this is why God made us for eternity, so we didn’t have to worry about that. Yet this body and this world will be changed so for now we are stuck in time as it flies by. My hope lies in Jesus where one day we can all live together in eternity and I can meet my grandparents all over again and get to know them again and Arden can meet my mom and dad all over again and time and location will no longer be barriers. At the same time, I’ll be able to spend time with Arden and Jack for eternity and enjoy their personalities.
Romans 8:18 I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.
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